Oh boy! Have I been away for a long time! My last post here was about my weight loss journey, and it was from all the way back in July 2020! To say that a lot has changed since then would be the understatement of the year, but let’s try a quick recap of the past 4+ years.

Professional front

• I’m still working at NSC, in Sweden.
• Still working on ESGF related activities, and taking a keen interest into FAIR and sensitive data.
• NSC is now the HQ of NAISS (naiss.se), AI is hot and getting hotter all the time!

Personal front

When I moved to Sweden and regained my love for biking, I’d resolved to never buy a car here in Sweden. In 2021, Shruti got pregnant again, and I decided that it was time to learn to drive and possibly, maybe rethink my decision to own a car! I spent a fortune (upwards of 60k SEK in all) and spent upwards of 120 hours on the road in total, driving with as many as five tutors at Magnussons and as many as four of my friends who graciously took on the responsibility of being my private tutors (Peter, Ali, Janna, Chandan), all of which culminated in my passing my B driver’s license test on my first attempt in September of 2021, a mere two weeks before the arrival of our child! Exactly a week after I’d passed my driving license test, I bought my first car, a Skoda Octavia combi. Peter was not only a key factor in my preparation for my DL test, but was also incredibly helpful with inputs that helped me decide on what car to buy! We checked out pretty much every car showroom in Linköping, before I pulled the trigger on the Skoda.

Pranav, our rainbow baby, after the late-term loss of our first child, Siddharth, arrived a week earlier than the planned induced-delivery which was originally planned for two weeks prior to full term, so he was a full three weeks early. He more than makes up for his smaller-than-average size though, with his naughtiness. Pranav is now three, going on four, and can already read alphabets and numbers, and loves reading out number-plates of cars in our basement and on the street! Shruti and I had to manage with Pranav on our own as the COVID-19 pandemic meant that air-travel from India was virtually banned. Shruti’s mom and granny did manage to arrive around the time Pranav was six months old, and we spent three memorable months together. September of 2021 was also the month I paused intermittent fasting, as it was getting hard to manage with the diet when I had to keep odd hours due to Pranav being quite the colicky kid. I didn’t then know that I wouldn’t resume intermittent fasting till January of 2025, when my weight had ballooned back up to 77 kg!

2022 saw us making our first India trip with Pranav, our previous trip having taken place before the pandemic. We celebrated Pranav’s first birthday in India, and that was the first time my parents got to meet him in person. What we didn’t know then was that it would also be the last time my dad would get to meet his grandson in person, as dad passed away in January 2024. On that trip though, Pranav got dysentery, and we had to cut short our planned month long vacation after a mere two weeks. A harrowing trip that ended appropriately with our return flight that ended up spending a full five hours on the tarmac before taking to the air, due to technical difficulties.

2023 began with Pranav starting life as a preschooler! It was an extremely stressful time for us for over a month as first Shruti, and then I tried to help him get adjusted to the environment of his preschool. 2023 was also the year we got to experience the true meaning of ‘vabruari’, a pejorative term for February, a month where most parents spend most of the time at home taking care of sick toddlers. Pranav got sick more times than we could be bothered to keep count, and each time he came home with a bug, we picked it up and went down too.

2023 was also the year Shruti and I started to think about getting my parents to visit again, but even as I was thinking of asking my parents about how they felt about it, dad mentioned to me that he wanted to visit us again during the summer! I was very happy to know that he was keen on making the trip, though mom appeared a bit more circumspect and guarded about it. I was keen that they get to enjoy a trip to Sweden and more when they were still free from hindrances to their mobility, but this was not to be. Even as I’d started putting together the paperwork for their visit, my sister called me and asked me to put my plans on a temporary hold, as she was trying to root-cause a change in dad’s gait that she’d picked up on. Her first suspicion was early stages of Parkinsons, but further investigations revealed that it was in fact colon cancer, and it was terminal. All thoughts of the planned visit were forgotten, and when dad suddenly got worse, I made a trip in June. That trip is all a bit of a daze for me. I found my dad in a confused state, and in denial of the situation. Most of my time was spent with paperwork, banking, and hospital visits. It was the first time I was away from Pranav and Shruti for such a long time. It was the last time I’d see dad when he was alive. The rest of 2023 was spent with a sense of uncertainty, helplessness, and sadness.

2024 started off with the news that dad was going down and fast. My sister, a doctor herself, did her best to keep us in the loop about dad’s condition in realtime, and she was now sure the end was not far off. He may or may not live past February, she’d said, but the end came even faster than she’d feared. I’d just finished my work on Jan 8th, when I got a call from my sister. Mom had called her in panic; dad was gone. The next few days were a period in which I had to keep my emotions in check and ensure that I could stay focused on the things that needed getting done, whether it was paperwork, religious rites, or meeting people. Purnima, my sister was my rock, and I was hers, as we ensured everything went off as per plans. Shruti was unwavering in her support too; it was very hard for her to remain in Sweden and not get to pay her last respects to her beloved father-in-law, who was simply ‘appa’ (dad) to her, but she knew well that I couldn’t handle the extra stress and legwork if Pranav were to fall sick in India. Dad’s loss is something that I’m still learning to come to terms with, but I’ve had plenty of help from friends and relatives to help me do it, and I’m incredibly grateful for all the support and love that I’ve received. This is the first time I’m writing in length about all of this, and I hope to write more in the near future.

June of 2024 was when mom visited us in Sweden again. This was in some ways a homage to dad, who was far keener than she’d been, to make the trip. It would be a change of scene for her, and she’d get to make the trip in his memory, so we got around to making plans. I got to work in earnest, planning a trip for all of us to Norway. It ended up being an RV adventure to Norway. I documented the trip on TeamBHP, a popular Indian motoring blog. It was a trip of many firsts for all of us, and we loved every minute of it.

New year resolutions are something I find rather silly, given that people start off many unrealistic and impractical ventures only to completely give up on it within a few days or weeks; I prefer birthdays to do my personal stock-taking and introspection, but this year, I decided it was high time I switched my focus back towards my health and well-being. My weight had crept up to nearly 77 kg and I’d actually become indifferent about my weight gain, which was frankly scary. What the actual tipping point was, is now unclear, but I’d clearly had enough, and I wanted to restart my journey towards better health, ASAP. I restarted intermittent fasting on Jan 15 2025, and have lost just under 4 kg since then. I’ve also started unicycling again and am beginning my journey back towards improved fitness levels.

This post has taken a while to write; blogging is after all so much more than just hitting send on a bunch of characters in a Facebook/reddit post, and it has truly been a cathartic experience. I can’t help but wonder if this feeling I get is similar to what a Catholic person experiences when he/she confesses. Feels good to be back.